Never Been Much For Dolls...

I did have a favorite whose name I can't remember.  She was my favorite because she could float.  She was always naked, not sure what happened to her clothes but she always had a rope around her neck.  Our favorite game was chase the floating doll in the creek while holding the rope so she would not out race me.  Kept me entertained for hours.

I never asked for dolls.  I asked for stick horses, stock trucks full of animals and real cap guns with holsters like they wore on westerns.
 
One Christmas I received a big red wagon, Radio Flyer, I think...and a doll.  I did give her a name, Belinda. She was a big baby and she had clothes.  Belinda was just a simple sit up or lay down baby with painted hair but she sure could ride in that wagon.

Helen, my dog, and I spent hours racing Belinda in the Radio Flyer down the hill.  Belinda always won and never fell out.  Helen and I didn't care who won.  We would pull Belinda in that big red wagon up the hill time after time.

Belinda never smiled nor laughed but Helen and I had a good enough time for all of us.

Happy Weekend.

We Moved Around A Lot...

when I was very young.  We traveled with Dad as he followed road construction and the money.  Where he was needed we were.  This meant different housing every month or so.  Sometimes amazing houses or apartments, other times not so great.

I remember one house.  I cannot tell the town nor the state but I cannot forget that house.  It was a house where magic lived, where squirrels talked to you and little people swam in the bathtub.

The house was two-storied with an amazing upstairs balcony.  I loved that place.  I could go up and look down and it would seem like miles to the ground.  I think I was about four years old maybe younger.

What I do remember is the way my mind wrapped itself around things and would not let go.

Having few toys didn't matter because Helen my first dog traveled with us. I remember playing with a small inflatable horse.  On the balcony I decided to see if my horse could fly.  It could not but it kinda floated on the wind like a leaf slowly to the ground.  This sent my mind another direction.  If it took that long to get to the ground, I could throw it over and run down to catch it.  What a wonderful new game!!

After about my fourth trip running break neck speeds from the upper balcony and out the front door, my mother came to check.

When called by Mother, Helen and I both sat properly waiting to hear what Mother had to say.  Helen and I  thought we'd done something wrong...again.

Mother asked, "What are you two up to now?  All I hear is running and slamming, running and slamming."  Mother stood with her hands on her hips with her no nonsense expression. Helen and I both knew she wasn't handing out cookies.

I decided to speak up and explain what we were doing.  We were tossing the horse off the balcony and if Helen and I ran really, really fast, we just knew we could catch that horse before it hit the ground. We just had to run faster.  That's what we were doing.  We just had to try harder, that's all.

Toward the end of my explanation Mother's hands left her hips. The mad left her eyes and there was a hint of a smile.  She patted Helen on the head and straightened the bow on my dress.  "Well," she said, "I admire your and Helen's faith and hard work.  Go ahead, just try not to slam the door when you go out." 

As Helen and I bounded up the stairway again with that poor inflatable horse I grinned at Helen and said, "See, I told you we weren't doing anything wrong!"  Helen said nothing but wagged her tail all the way to the balcony.

Going Back

Looking back, I can see I have always had sun grins.  Funny how you notice things like that.  The first picture is my first dog, Helen and Mom.  The top picture is me.  The third is me and some one I don't remember.

Helen was given to me by Helen, therefore, her name.  Mom said we got into trouble one day for pulling all the tissues out of the box.  I was putting them back in and Helen was helping too.  She would carry one over and stuff it in the box opening with her nose.  I wonder if Mom used those tissues after that?

I was in trouble again, who me, I never did anything wrong to get into trouble!  I think it was playing in the clay with my good clothes on, Mom was coming after me with a switch.  Helen stood between me and Mom and growled!  Mom was so shocked that I missed that whipping.

Helen lived to about sixteen.  She was worn out.  Sometimes, Helen would cry when she moved.  I was home alone, when she started crying again.  It was awful. 

I called the neighbor and asked will you shoot my dog?  Terry came and he was shocked when I handed him a gun.  He said I thought you wanted me to give it a shot.  No, I said, Helen is suffering and I can't stand it any more.  Can you put her down? 

I had already dug a grave in the barn lot and found something to wrap her in.  I told Terry I had taken her out there and said my goodbyes.  If you can wrap her and just throw enough dirt over her so I can't see, I can finish.

Of course, the tears are rolling.  I cover my head with a pillow and never heard the shot.  Terry came back, handed me the gun and said it's over, Gail.  She went easy.  I hugged him with tears flooding and went to the barn lot and cried on Helen's grave until Mom and Dad came home.

I told them. I know they were proud, although they never said a word. Dad's hand on my shoulder and Mom's sad eyes said it all.  Helen was not suffering any more.  It was the hardest thing I have ever done,  making that decision.

NOTE:  I know this may sound harsh to some but the times were different.  You only used a vet if it was an animal that made you money, like a work horse or a cow.  Dogs were special but they only got rabies shots.  If your dog died, you got another one and life went on.  After all, it was just a dog.