Happy Birthday, Breasts!

You are forty-six today
I am fifty-eight
For forty-six years I hid you
Today we celebrate.

You entered my life
Around the age of twelve
Oh, how you made it
A total living hell.

From the "budding" to "perky"
You were never welcome here
I could no longer climb trees as well
And a shirt I had to wear.

Bosom, ta-ta's, boobs or tits
All the names they call you
Not one
Seemed to fit.

I finally knew
As every lady should
I called you breasts
You made my sweaters look good.

No longer at attention
You've not fared as well as me
Unless confined within a bra
You tend to swing free.

Today we celebrate
I know you are low
But perk up, my beauties!
We've many years to go.