a tale of tails, tenacity, and tedium, as told by me, usually barefoot and bellowing

Friday, April 29, 2011

Farm Fun...

proliferates.  After hubby's return from the hospital, I have debated many ways to end his suffering and mine.  I stupidly gave him a bell!!!  I was beckoned by the sound to put his socks on.  I have made him tiny cups of jello.  I have assisted him in the shower.  I have spoiled him rotten.  When I finally take a nap, he disappears from his recliner and is out driving the Mule.

I am bottle feeding Lovely (named by grandson, Jake)  Hubby slowly, painfully advances to the barn to observe Lovely's  feeding time.  It has been three days since hubby has seen Lovely.  I am feeding her through a crack in the stall door.  Believe me, this is the only safe way.  I go in the stall to open a window so Lovely can enjoy some sunshine and fresh air.  Lovely is butting me all the way, I am pushing her back, roughly and it makes no difference to her...I am the one that brings the milk.  I finally get to the window, which needs two hands to open.  Hubby is watching.  Lovely runs between my legs and lifts me off the ground!  Where's the milk, mama?

Hubby is greatly entertained and regretted the absence of a movie camera.  He said she never does me that way...well, hubby you have been outta the loop.  He says, she has grown, bet she weighs a hundred pounds...no kidding!!  I safely escape the stall and feed her the rest of her milk through the stall door.  We HAVE to get her on a cow...this is killing me.

THENNNNNNNNNNN, while I was in the barn, the outside gate blew open.  The horses escaped.  Quietly grazing, I knew/thought it would be no problem to get them back in their pasture.  The two Borders are working them quietly back to the barn.  Ki appears and scatters them to the wind!!!

OH, great!  Ki's not listening, the horses aren't listening, they are galloping around the valley and all I can think of is Beverly's garden.  I must keep them out of the garden!  I quickly grab some dog food in a bucket, whistle, and they are still galloping every where.  Andrew comes out and captures the trouble making dog. 

I shake that bucket and get Knot's attention.  I whistle, I call, I say whoa.  They are clear to the creek, milling in excitement.  They decide to gallop my way, straight toward me.  I bravely stand, shaking the bucket over my head.  I have huge animals running toward me and like an idiot, I stand.  They whirl around me and I start giving handfuls of dog food and head walking fast to the barn because the horses are still dancing.  I have four excited equines dancing around me and I am lost in the herd.  I am handing out dog food and walking fast.  These beauties probably have a collective weight of 4000 pounds.  Did I mention I was too trusting?  They run up to me, slammed on their brakes, veered around me and I just keep moving to the gate handing out dog food.

Marcy has noticed the problem and has arrived with a bucket of sweet feed and is shaking the bucket in the horse pasture.  Marcy stepped behind the gate as I lured the wild horses in.  She scattered feed on flat rocks and they were still dancing!!!  I said, out, Marcy, while trying to keep them away from her.  Big excited animals can produce accidents...thankfully that did not happen.  Marcy left closing the gate behind her, I scattered feed and also left, locking that gate behind me.

I can't stand much more excitement and Ki is still on my sh*t list!



I say you had some tornadic action on your property. I laughed because I could just see the horses dancing around and you shaking the bucket over your head. Very funny story. Thanks for repeating. REST NOW.
Blessings. B

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a typical day on the farm (except for the hubby just back from the hospital-hope he's doing well). I must say, I raised a bottle calf that was horribly painful. He caused so much pain trying to feed him. Of course, he's now a three thousand pound ox and a gentle giant.


Ruth @ Hope, Joy and Faith Farm said...

We are feeding 3 calves right now and only have 1 bottle bucket and 1 bottle, so that keeps feeding time interesting. I can definitely visualize your thundering herd heading towards you... And for hubby, well, a shotgun would work, but a 22 pistol is quieter. When mine was sick a few weeks ago, I'd hear "honey..." in this plantive tone. It was horrible.

IanH said...

Say Gail, you certainly have more fun on the farm than I do. I will have to try that bell thing with Elaine the next time I get laid up. It sounds like it is a magic bell!

Anyway, your hubby deserves a lot of TLC. Keep him happy, get him well and then you will appreciate him more!

Ps Tell your man he owes me $5 for moral support. ;-}

Nora said...

Hell Gail, you have enough excitement in your life for several people. That's was an awesome description you gave of that adventure and even of the calf butting you across the barn. Are you full of bruises? I don't know if I could stand that much excitement but I wish someone had caught it on film. It would do great on YouTube. Rest now and let someone take care of you.

Hope said...

enjoyed your story very much!
hope you and your hubby are doing well
take care!

An English Shepherd said...

Hope you other half is recovering well. And you ...

Wizz :-)

Pat said...

Gosh my life seems so dull compared to yours! I only have to reign in one out of control animal - my husband!

Sue said...

Sheesh! You always have an amazing tale to tell!!


PS. I have learned NOT to give my hubby a bell when he is convalescing. He becomes insufferable.

Buttons said...

I enjoyed the story of your day I am sure much more than you did enjoy living it. What a day. Hope your husband is doing better. Lose the bell.
Be careful with Lovely it will be awful for you to get hurt.
Take care it must be the season my neighbours horses were out visiting everyone the other day.
Be careful and try to relax a little. B

LindaG said...

After that, all I can say is *hugs* ♥

Were out most of the day, so am catching up. :)

Nezzy said...

I used to straddle baby calve to bottle break 'em and let me tell ya I've been on a few surprise rides myself.

The horses are a whole other matter girl. I'm so happy they had good breaks! Heeehehe!

Stay safe and have a blessed day! :o)

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