a tale of tails, tenacity, and tedium, as told by me, usually barefoot and bellowing

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Should've Bought Stock In Charmin

I have the crud with a capital C!  Still have it, don't see it leaving soon.  It is having a wonderful time visiting with me.  Been two weeks now and can't get it to go home.

I have gone through enough rolls of Charmin that I should have bought stock.  If any of you have stock in that wonderful company, look for it to sky rocket.  I am buying the super big rolls and my nose loves it.  So soft, so squeezable, so absorbant.

Yes, I use Charmin to blow my nose!  Cheaper and I can roll out as much as I need!  Much, much better than John Wayne toilet paper...rough, tough and won't take s--- off anybody!

I believe I am improving a bit.  Today I have the voice of a pre-teen boy, varying in squeaks and deepness.  I had to communicate with my hearing impaired (notice my political correctness) customers with sign language because I can not talk loud enough to be heard by all.

I guess we have to be sick some time to appreciate how good we feel the rest of the time.

Two weeks and I am on the down side of this.  Don't despair, there will be plenty of Charmin to go around.  I heard they have upped the production just for me.


Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

LOL You are a total hoot! I think I will go and buy stock right now..because I blow my nose on it too...as does sweet spouse.

Yes, oh great sick one, Easter is just around the corner, in a bit over two weeks. And for me two weeks fly by!

Not ready. Not ready for St. Pat's day either.
Irish or not..we Irish are procrastinators! BIG TIME!
Get well!! Ok?
I will skip the hug..oh..wait...it's safe on here.
Mona :)

Nezzy said...

Dang girl, you haven't shaken that crud off yet? I found a marvelous product at the health food store, a little late for you this time but baby next time you can nip it in the bud.

It's call Advantage, it's a liquid and tastes like all get out but let me tell you sister, I'm a believer. I was showin' all the signs of gettin' the junk Hubs drug home...achy bod, sore throat just startin' to feel lousy and let me tell ya it was gone in two days. Hubs hung on for weeks. I won't be caught without it.

Take care a chase that nasty visitor right off the farm! God bless and have a great evening!

Rae said...

You poor thing. It sounds awful. I hope you are on the mend soon.

Rural Rambler said...

Gail, I really am sorry you have the creepin'cruds but you are too too funny! We are loyal to Cottonelle in this small family of two and we use our Cottonelle TP for EVERYthing! Nose blowin', wiping up junk off the floor, as TP, plugging up bloody noses, cleaning out sinks, I mean EVERYthing. Even a dinner napkin when the kitchen is too far from the porch.

Get yourself better quick!

Razzberry Corner said...

It seems ALOT of people I know are sick right now! Get well soon!


You write the funniest blog I've read and I hope you get rid of the CRUD soon.
I've had a cough since Christmas and I've given up on it leaving. Hopefully by next Christmas.
I just keep hacking away and my husband chases me with the cough med which I detest. He swears it will take it away. I've downed two bottles already and it's still with me.
Cough hack hack. Get well soon. Blessings, Barb

Queen-Size funny bone said...

feel better soon. and don't squeeze the charmin. blowing your nose. what would mr. whipple say?

Rudee said...

I thought you meant you had crud coming from the other end. I'm a little slow these days. I never buy tissues anymore, either...until I get a cold. Then I don't care how much they cost, I get the brand with the lotion.

Rudee said...

Oh, not only am I slow, I'm rude. Feel better, Gail!

The Green Stone Woman said...

I'm sorry you're still sick. With me a cure of antibiotics worked well. I was over it quickly. I don't take them, but once in ten years. They were worth it.

Diandra said...

I'm sure you'll get better soon!

Pyatshaw said...

When I read the heading I thought you meant you should have bought cattle in (a place called) Charmin!
We never buy tissues. It's kitchen roll for us....until a really bad cold then something really soft is called for, like quilted toilet roll! I've almost forgotten what a handkerchief is.

Pat said...

This is the first day of Spring and I hope your cold has SPRUNG out of ya! Hope you feel better!

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