a tale of tails, tenacity, and tedium, as told by me, usually barefoot and bellowing

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Out Of Focus

I think I have lost myself over nothing.

I am pretty straight forward and what you see is what you get.  However, I made a mistake and commented on some one's post and messed up everything.  I thought comments were just that, comments.  I have hurt this person by having a different opinion than they. I tried to fix it, it only got worse and the bad thing is, it wasn't a bad comment at all but just one they disagreed with.

I really dislike what I have allowed this to do to me.  I am now afraid to comment...on anything.

To me, comments are like chocolate, I can never get enough.  I love interacting with people and always answer comments made on my posts.  I welcome comments, open comments, honest comments and even comments with which I do not agree although I have never had one of them.

I guess, I just got my feelings hurt and obviously I can't handle that as well as I thought. My immaturity is showing.

What is so hurtful about this is we have communicated a long time. I enjoyed our communications.  We had even surprised each other with small presents. I had  been invited to visit...twice.  Now, by their choice, we no longer communicate.  I was told never to contact this person again, because my view was not their view.

This has instilled an unrealistic fear in me about writing anything at all.

So if I am absent, I am trying to heal my pettiness.  Think of me.


Breathe said...

Please come by my blog and disagree with me vehemently. I work in politics and don't know what to do if everyone thinks the same about issue, ideas, or situations. But it's what seems to be expected in some sections of the blogging community.

And even when we disagree in my work world, we can do so with respect for the other person.

In fact, I live in a community where my political leanings are in a significant minority. And yet, we still remain friends with people around us.

Would that the blogging community could be the same...

Anyway, come by and let's hang out. and disagree agreeably :)

~Tonia said...

Ahh Gail I am sure we didnt disagree rudely.. That just doesnt seem like you.. I have had someone verbally attack me on my blog but that was a whole different deal! They were in my real life at the time too! Please dont feel intimidated to comment on my blog..
We are human sometimes we cant help to have a little pettiness no matter how hard we try not too!

ellen abbott said...

Gail, it's not your problem, but the other persons. Some people are so insecure that they cannot have people around them who disagree with them. I can relate to you because I have had the same thing happen more than once though I am not a mean person. I just speak my mind. so don't take it to heart. Feel free to say whatever you want on my blog. I like it better that way.

Gramma Ann said...

I hope you can put this behind you and come visit my blog, Say whatever you like. If my quotes, pictures or reading, is disagreeable with you say so, I don't care. And if you don't like my jokes in the fun room, tell me and leave a funnier one. hehheehee.

~Tonia said...

I meant I am sure YOU didnt disagree rudely!! not we!! Stinkin typos!! I am having a bad case of typoitis tonight!!

Rudee said...

Nothing is more disappointing, than opening a box of chocolates and finding every single one of them to be the same. Unless of course, they are the Dom Perignon Champagne truffles made by Teuschers. Talk about want to die and go to heaven chocolate? This is it.

As for the rest of it, I don't know what your politics are Gail, nor do I care. I like you for the great big heart that you seem to have. We are becoming a nation of divisiveness, and it's a frightening thing to behold. Where is this coming from? This intolerance of opinion and people who are different than us is shameful.

Here's hoping your next box of chocolates has many varieties--even a few new ones to try. And if you come across a box of champagne truffles, let me know. I'll come down and help you eat them!

Pat said...

Unfortunately, this friend wasn't as good as a friend as you thought; otherwise she would have respected your opinion whether it differed from hers or not.

I know you're a little gun shy but there is no need to be, it sounds like, from the commentors here.

Say it like it is!

VioletSky said...

Thank you for becoming a new follower!

I have never had that kind of experience with comments. But I can see where it could be distressing (for you; they are being immature and way too sensitive). Sometimes, I wish someone would disagree with me to liven things up a bit!

In fact, I am going through a different dilemma - finding too many blogs where the blogger doesn't respond to, or acknowledge, the comments. At times I find it rude, though with some photoblogs, I can sort of understand it. Still, would it kill you to say thanks for liking my photos?

Queen-Size funny bone said...

what a boring, pathetic world it would be if we all thought alike.
I welcome comments unlike my own.
I feel sorry for the blogger who is not open minded enough to see it is just a point of view take it or leqave it and go on.

Jennifer said...

Hi just stopping by to say thank you for visiting/following my blog.

I hope you don't let one negative experience stop you from commenting on blogs. I am sorry someone took your comment so personally. They should realize that it would be a pretty boring world if everyone thought the same. I once wrote a blog about the moving of Plum Island to the mainland, I definitely got some opinions that were different than mine! While I felt like one of them could have been expressed in a more polite way, I certainly didn't hold it against them and I would really hate for that person to stop reading my blog or commenting on it. I can take differing opinions, and very much welcome them! It keeps life interesting and if we have an open mind we might just learn something too. Feel free to disagree with me on my blog anytime!

Nola @ the Alamo said...

Sorry to hear of your sadness. I love different opinions, it opens my eyes to other ways of thinking! Come by and disagree (or agree) with me any time.
Nobody said it better than Dr Seuss: “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

I've been blogging for more than 4 years, so I've had a few experiences such as what you've been through. It's bound to happen eventually with as many people, from different walks of life, we communicate with via the internet. I have pretty thin skin, too, but I'm learning that it's not possible to make everyone like you...or for you to get along with everyone all the time either.
Many of the folks you meet via blogville are folks you'd never even speak with in the real world, so don't take it so hard.

It's, sadly, just par for the course. Thankfully, there are many many bloggers (potential online friends) out there, so don't be too hard on yourself.

You're a sweet gal, Gail and I'm glad to have met you, my bloggy friend!


Kana said...

It's sometimes hard to strike the right "tone" in this context-free medium - without inflection, facial expression and a shared history, it's easy to let a difference of opinion become emphatic declarative - that You're Wong And I'm Right. It's important to phrase things clearly and kindly, and to give messages you receive the benefit of - not doubt, but optimism. That OF COURSE they meant it the best way possible. It's the only way to get through your online day! Too bad your friend couldn't take the perceived pressure, and given you that benefit.

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