As you may remember from my backwards updates the wonderful icing on my birthday cake was to learn my youngest daughter and her youngest son had been in a car accident. A serious one for her but no permanent injuries for her son. After four surgical procedures and a full week in the hospital they sent her "home" to us.
It does change your perspective. We've never thought of handicapped as a problem. We now know it will be because of the problems we've had in caring for Maria. We know for sure now Handicapped is not just a blue sign or a place we can't park...yet.
In my guest room I have a very high antique bed, had to make it lower so she could sit and then position herself. She sleeps with her head at the foot of the bed so Zander won't kick her leg during the night.
Three hops to the bathroom, six hops to the sitting room. She has a walker but must hop on her good foot. She can't use crutches due to her chest injury which they have not named yet. For her to reach things while in bed I had to take a shelf off my newly constructed "kitchen raft". The old radio I had used for a night stand did not meet her needs.
We prop her in a wing back chair with phone, computer, tv remotes and drinks in hand's reach. All her meals are eaten there since her ankle must be elevated most of the time propped on another chair in front of her with pillows, towels and ice packs and walker in reach.
It is a major deal to arrive at the shower. She "walks" to the lodge door which has one step down, she turns her back to us as we brace an office chair. She sits. We wheel her through the tv room to the kitchen threshold where this move is repeated. Roll through the dining room into the hall and hop into the bathroom. We finally emptied the bathroom and got the shower chair in there so she can shower. We just don't think in handicap terms!
Our house is upside down. Rugs rolled up every where because the walker will hang and the chair won't roll. My craft/guest room/sitting area is her abode. Shelves and decorative items for the bathroom have moved to the dining room.
That gently slopping yard to our lowest entry point even presented a problem but it was far better than the other entries which have three to seven steps.
I have a new found respect for the handicapped people in the world and especially for those people who live alone. There is no way Maria could have gone home alone.
I also know, for sure, things can change in a instant. I knew because of Hubby's health issues and my sister's health issues. I never really thought how quickly it can change. I am more grateful than I was. She had a job, a car, and in one instant, despite all she did, both was lost from the foolishness of another driver. We are blessed, it could have been worse.
Today she returned to the doctor after almost falling on her foot and screaming so loud I heard her from outside.
They removed the cast and the dressing. Let me just say a pretty turned ankle does not have black oozing green...and that is how it looks! The doctor asked if she took her antibiotics. The releasing doctor did not write a script. Fortunately her earlier mishap did not harm the bone, still pinned and screwed. The wound is open but the doctor today did not know if the doctor before had left it open or if the fall had opened it. Conclusion: None. Given antibiotics and sufficient pain pills. Come back Monday and the doctor who did the surgery will look at it and decide if skin grafts are necessary.
Please continue to hold her in your prayers. I'm losing faith in doctors!
29 comments:
i am so very sorry for her pain and all that goes with this accident and change to her life. i hope she can mend!
Des ding healing thoughts x
Oh my goodness, that poor thing. So if it is not oozing black and green, that is a good sign!!!! Those antibiotics are crucial ...:)JP
Bless you for being the caregivers for your daughter. I'm sure this is very difficult for her to have to struggle to get around. It's hard to say who is at fault with the open wound, and you will probably not get a straight story with a lawyer and a deposition. Hope the accident is covered by someone. God bless!
I will be praying for her! Hope that first doctor didn't screw up.
Oh for the grace of God, could one minute have been different. So glad she has you guys to help & I hope she continues to heal.
Oh Gail I just want to send hugs your family has been through so much but you can get through it because one thing I know that is what you do together. Take care and hope it turns out alright with the doctor.HUG B
What an ordeal for her and for the rest of the family. You still have her...that is the silver lining in that particularly dark cloud. Thoughts and prayers headed her way from Guelph Ontario.
Sorry to hear she was hurt and hope she get better soon.
My husband's son was in a terrible accident about 4 years back and he broke his pelvis. There was talk of him staying with us, when we realized our home wouldn't fit his needs. The doorways were too small for a wheelchair, we only have one bedroom and our dogs were an issue. Thankfully he was taken in by a friend and is doing much better. You really don't realize how your home is made for the handicapped.
Praying for answers and help and a doctor with a brain!
I'll be thinking of you. Remember to care for the caregiver too! These situations can be so hard on caregivers. And yes, nice you have any serious health limitations, life changes!
Ah poor Maria. You will find ways to cope and do things, using crutches would be a good thing, they should have sent her home in a wheelchair....she doesn't need to fall and injure herself. Sounds like one Doctor doesn't know what the other is doing....Monday is a long way off to wait and see.. I don't think I would wait that long especially if it is oozing...my goodness:(
Lord, Lord! Taking care of our children was so much simpler when they were small! It sounds like you've got your work cut out for you for sometime into the foreseeable future as your daughter heals and regains her independence. I am glad she is young, she will fight her way back. Your message comes thru loud and clear here - life can change in an instant, and so can your day to day routines and realities as you know them. Blessed is the mother who can switch gears and do what must be done to care for her child and grandchild. My heart and prayers are with you. XOXO, Josie
Good grief! It sure does make you appreciate what the handicapped go through every waking moment. I'm so glad you are there for your daughter and hope she improves quickly. It is so important to be an advocate when it comes to visitations with Doctors.
Oh no, your poor daughter. It is always some lunatic on the roads who causes these accidents, it doesn't matter how careful you are.
Her leg sounds very painful, I hope it heals completely and she mades a full recovery. She is in my prayers.
Lynne x
Maria is so fortunate to have you all. I know the care she will receive and so sad to hear how it all happened. I pray that this all heals good Gail. She is young so she has that going for her. Green Ooze does not sound the way a wound should heal. What is wrong with these Doctors today. And yes, it does give you a very different outlook on the handicapped and the challenges they face each and every day. I shall continue to keep Maria in my prayers. Watch that wound and watch Maria - any sudden changes and whisk her back quickly. Take care my friend.
i lost my faith in doctors about 10 years ago and it gets worse by the day... so sorry your house is upside down, can't imagine how tough it is to have someone handicapped and the house is not built for that. we have discussed if one of us needed a wheel chair, it would not go in either bathroom door. but now i know in a pinch we could use the computer chair. great idea.. i do hope she doesnt need more surgery and how in the world she did not get antibiotics is amazing to me.. i hope these visits are not all the way to Little Rock. hang in there, all of you..
YIKES . . . all the way around! This gives me a very clear picture of what Maria is going through . . . and you and the household. Excellent post although I am not happy any of you are having to go through it! Makes me rethink HANDICAP!
Prayers are coming your way. She is so fortunate to have you there to take care of her. My brother was in an accident the summer after he graduated from high school and is now in a wheel chair. Sounds like your daughter can walk and will recover, at least most of her mobility. We do gain perspective when these things happen. Life is fragile. Blessings to you.
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Holy crap....
The doctor did not give her antibiotics and left the wound open????????? I'm with you on the loss of faith in the medical community.
Your household is wonderful to make your daughter's convolesence easier for her. Gold stars on everyone's charts.
And of course prayers for all of you will continue. xoxo
Oh. Super mom (you) will have to go beyond that, and go in to auto-mode. No words could begin to express how awful her injuries are.
My prayers are with you and God has wrapped His arms around you and Maria.
Gail,
I'm sending prayers and have placed Maria's name with our prayer group for a healthy and speedy recovery.
They're cases where wounds are left open to help heal depending on where the wound is. I don't understand why the doctor did not prescribed an antibiotic.
I've taken care of handicapped family members. It's hard to know exactly what is needed until they move through your house. At which point, you'll learn what needs to be removed or just moved out of the way.
Praying for wellness, and full recovery.
I am so glad she is home and being cared for by such an enterprising and loving family. However, she really has been dealt a terrible deal. We are all just one breath away from life as we know it changing. I will keep her in my prayers for a complete recovery.
Oh my goodness, sounds like you all are going through some of the same sh-- we went through 4 years ago when my son had his accident. Hopefully you can get the drs. together before more damage is done. Stay on it closely my son wound up with a staff infection from drs not doing what they were supposed to do. USe the internet and ask lots of questions.
I can relate to the handicap thing also after what we went through, there was a place here that loaned at no cost all the handicap aids he had to have such as shower seats, wheel chairs, etc.You might check around to find one of those ,it was a real blessing not to have to buy all that stuff.
Prayers going out to all of you.
Hope she heals quickly.
Marilyn
Praying for all of you. Transitioning to handicapped accessible is really difficult to do on short notice!
Oh my gosh, Gail..I cannot even imagine. Bless her heart- she must be in awful pain. Doctors! Grrrr. Don't get me started. I hope that she didn't open the wound, and like one commenter above- watch for staff infection. I'll be keeping all of you in my prayers.
Gail, my heart goes out to her and all her family. I can't imagine what you all must be going through right now.
I am constantly surprised how doctors don't seem to communicate with each other within the same medical organization (or whatever they call them these days). It's like the right hand doesn't know what the left is doing or why.
Couldn't the doctor seeing her picked up a phone? or tried to find the surgeon. Now she had to go through the agony of another appointment that might have not been necessary.
None of our houses are set up for disabled. I know what a problem our old farmhouse would be.
I will be thinking of you all.
I have trouble trusting doctors, too. Unbelievable.
However, I do have faith in the greatest Healer of all, and I will be petitioning Him for your daughter's healing.
Merry Christmas to you all. As you say, it could have been worse. And this season is all about miracles.
=)
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