a tale of tails, tenacity, and tedium, as told by me, usually barefoot and bellowing

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

They Changed My License Plate!

It has taken me forever to memorize the old one.  Now I have to begin again.  My old one was LCO AKA Loco or that's what I called it.  The one before was OldWildCrazy. Easy ones to check before you climb in the car. I am now labeled WGM.  WildGooseMadame?   WoefullyGoneMental?

I have to remember the number. Why?  Well, I don't have a modern car that honks and flashes lights and yells, "Here I am, idiot, right where you parked me!!!  So I have to REMEMBER where I'm parked. My car is very ordinary and blends well.

Do you know how many cars look like mine when I go to Walmart?  Just about a bazillion!

It's good that I am familiar with map reading because that has enabled me to develop my Park Find Fail Proof System or some days known as Park Fool Forget Pray Search.  I not only have a number but also a letter from the front of the store.like M (under Walmart or the m in pharmacy) 3 (the row number) is my location which I sometimes write down if it's gonna be a long time inside.

I have no idea what my problem with relocating my vehicle is but it exists and plagues me constantly.  Even when riding with Hubby I have climbed into the wrong black truck!  Thank goodness most people know me so they don't shoot.

Once when in the state capital I came out to my car (yep, MY CAR!) and was upset and ranting about how someone had mashed the side in...wasn't my car.  I figured that out when my key wouldn't open it.  Two rows over was my car still in fine shape.

I hang large items on my mirrors so I can peek in and not totally embarrass myself by not choosing MY CAR.  I have stickers on my windows.  I never wash it...all things which should help me with my car finding deficit.

I will say the Walmart Associates are very helpful.  On a day when I had postponed shopping until I could no longer scratch one more meal out of the kitchen, was using dish washing liquid for shampoo and laundry soap I had to go.

My cart packing is famous.  I use pizzas for side boards and I can pack that baby high and safe.  The only problem with that is when they put it in sacks, the items no longer pack that well.  So I'm through with TWO carts...did I mention I detest shopping?  I make it out the big automated doors with no alarms going off and I stop.  I stand scanning the parking lot because this was before I had my brilliant numbers system in place.  A very helpful associate ask if he could assist.  I answer, Trying to remember where I left my car.

A very serious elderly associate asks, "Ma'am, do you remember what COLOR your car is?"

I did not dignify that with a answer.  I thanked him and confidently strolled into the huge parking lot as if I knew where my car was.

I must trade cars!!!  I think it will be hot pink with purple stripes and flags on the antenna. When I do that you know there will be a bazillion just like my new car, too!


Jo said...

Oh Gail, I 'm laughing myself silly at your wonderfully funny post. Probably because this has happened to me as well. Now we have a car which is a little different (in South Africa the majority of people drive large Toyotas- SUV's cruisers and stationwagons; we chose a Hyunda SUV i!) AND I insisted on having personalized number plates: Our surname. Thanks for a delightful read. Blessings Jo (Tanzania)

Country Gal said...

Sounds like our car all though I don't drive Papa does I can , just not legally lol any who ours is a Chrysler mini van Caravan and in a blueish purple colour and there are thousands of that colour of them out there so when we got it 6 years ago we tied a red ribbon on the antenna and that helped a lot lol ! Hope you and your new car have fun and don't loose her in the parking lot lol ! Thanks for sharing , Have a good day !

Sandra said...

wild girl momma,
why get mad (myf avorite), whogoneme
sorry that's all i got to busy laughing at your story,... I have only misplaced my car twice in my life..I just used the remote to make it go off. and don't know my tag and never have... i did try to open a kia a month ago with my remote and it did not work. the kia identical to mine was 3 cars over.
put a bumper sticker on both bumpers, something only you will have.
my dad was like you say here, he lost his car almost every time he parked it.
once he got up and got dressed and went out to get in his car and it was not in the driveway...he thought someone stole it. he ran out in the middle of the street and looked both ways and 5 houses down he saw it parked in front of a house. he had stopped to talk with the man on his front porch and then walked home leaving the car...
lots of people here have bright colored tennis balls on their antenna.

Saucy Kodz said...

I was thinking more like WomanGoneMad..... he,he
We also attached a small flag or ribbon to the antenna. Once I came out of the store in a hurry and jumped in the car and turned on the ignition and the car didn't work. I was almost ready to call for help, when I noticed a pack of ciggys on the counsil and thought to myself "No one smokes in my car"?????? I got out of the car just as an older man was pushing his cart up to it and he laughed and said "My wife told me I was getting a surprise today for my birthday - are you my surprise"?? and then he laughed again. Next to his car was mine and I explained what happened. We both laughed and he was happy to have a story to tell the wife when he got home and then of course I got in my car, MY CAR and left. ha,ha Only had that happen once and that was about 8 years ago......so PINK like yer boots, Eh. ha,ha lol to all, hugz to Marcy.

Lynne said...

Fun post . . . I enjoy a giggle at your expense!
Do you ever walk out those Walmart doors and experience a moment of panic?
Might happen if you purchase a pink car version . . .
someone might steal it!

TexWisGirl said...

Who Gonna Makeme :)

i do think you need some outrageous bumper stickers. :)

Dreaming said...

Oh, what joyful (?) memories your post brought forth! The worst was the time I parked on the third floor on the west side of the airport. I went in to get my sister who had flown in to see me. We got jabbering and took a tour of the parking facility. I had gone to the third floor of the east side! Nope... my car wasn't there!
I often wondered about how many folks end up riding the tram around and around trying to locate their cars at a place like Disney!
How about an antenna dealy-bopper?
Oh, WGM is certainly Wonderfully Good Mama!

Linda Wildenstein said...

You are a hoot. So now I'll share my car struggle with you....no, I can usually find my car just fine, it's bright orange, has a large orange ball on the antenae and has a sticker on the back panel that says "Beware: Invisible dragon in the back seat". I have a stuffed, ride on dragon, the size of a St. Bernard in the back seat. Sure starts a lot of conversations when folks want to know have they lost their minds because they say they can see the invisible dragon and I just giggle.
Even with all that....yep, I still lose track of the Omamobile but I do have that idiot device you spoke of and use it. And then my car calls to me.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Is it wrong I laughed? I think you need a new paint job. And maybe a giant sign on the top of your car.

Linda Kay said...

My mode of operation is to observe the direction I am walking into the store (that is if I remember to), so I can just get that bearing when I come back out.

Karen S. said...

How fun this post was, you sure made my day, and well I can relate in so many ways too. Hehehe!

Far Side of Fifty said...

I have the same problem. Luckily I don't go many places and if I do I always park in the same spot...usually next to one of those cart bins in the lot so I don't have to search for my car and a spot to take the cart. I need a flag too! One time in Wisconsin I couldn't find my car...thought it was stolen and Chance was in it. I pushed every button on my key thingy to get the lights to beep..nothing happened. Luckily Far Guy found me and the car:)

labbie1 said...

Hehe! Too funny! :)

I read a blog where the person got into her car, started it and drove home only to find that it had cheerios all over the interior. After looking more closely, it WASN'T her car but her key had worked! Yikes! Can you imagine?????

Oh, and a hint from one who travels constantly--take a picture of your vehicle's license plate(s) on your cell phone so that you can find it quickly when you need it (like when the vehicle gets stolen or you need to include the license plate number on a registration).

Lin Floyd said...

you are too funny, but I can relate just went to walmart today for food shopping...

A Quiet Corner said...

Although we take the truck for most grocery trips, it is huge and easy to find. My car is so small that it is dwarfed by all the SUVs on the road....:)JP

Susan Anderson said...


Our silver SUV is hard to pick out in a crowd, also. I have to take extra care to sort of find landmarks and memorize where it is. I hate losing my car in a parking lot. I look like such an idiot hunting around for it!


DesertHen said...

I can relate to this very well! There are six or seven cars that look just like mine and every time I go to Walmart, they are there shopping too! I have gone to the wrong "my" car many times! Boy do I feel silly!

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