a tale of tails, tenacity, and tedium, as told by me, usually barefoot and bellowing

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Things I've Learned This Week...

Rock and wood, when applied with equal force from opposite directions will hurt flesh and bone.

All the work can not be done in two days.

I think a women (just guessing) invented the ice maker 'cause no male (living here) would ever think someone else might want ice...and refill the ice trays.

Snakes can jump over one third their length...quickly.

Even a square shovel can be a Weapon of Mass Destruction if the user is properly motivated.

It can get hot enough for the steering wheel of a vehicle to melt.

Air conditioners in vehicles and homes are programmed to stop working on the hottest day.

Dirty dishes grow when you're not looking.

You can not turn a doorknob when you are holding a pork chop, a book and a camera without spilling your iced tea.

If you are awake before daylight, dark is not too early to go to bed.

When you have recently rearranged every stick of furniture in your home, DO NOT try to walk in the dark.

Knowing, sometimes my words do make a difference, makes me smile.

16 comments:

Karen said...

Sounds like you've learned quite a lot this week ;-) Thanks for giving me an early morning smile.

Tamara said...

You just made me smile....again :)

Dreaming said...

Why is it that we try to carry everything... and then spill our iced tea trying to open a door?! Was the pork chop on a plate?!

Hmmm... a see a book in the future: Things we Know to be True, or the Truisms of Women, or Women are Right, or Women Write...

Jules said...

FYI, rock and wood made me laugh. It also brought back painful memories. I want to see a snake jump and your words have always mattered to me. :)

PS and Marcy's pictures.
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

LindaG said...

That's a lot of stuff to learn.

It can get hot enough for the steering wheel of a vehicle to melt.

I knew that about trash bags...

Hope your weekend is better! :)

ellen abbott said...

Funny. I think I've learned some of those lessons myself.

Michaele said...

You are smart and funny and funny and smart. Love this!

Barbara said...

Love the one about the dishes growing, now that is a fact, lol love your blog and have to come daily to see what you are up to.
Lots of hugs, Barbara

Pat said...

You just HAD to mention snakes again! *grin*

I'm curious....a porkchop, a book, and a camera? Was the porkchop on a plate or were you going to eat it on a stick? Ha ha!

Love this post and your words of wisdom!

Unknown said...

I've tried these sorts of acrobatics myself, and you're right! It just doesn't work out for the liquids does it? And you know what? I never learn my lesson!

I'm so sorry for missing out on your cute comment! I'm not exactly computer literate, so if you can give me a quick tutorial to set that up (if it works on blogger AND on me, wink, wink...), I will sure give it a try!!!

Thanks for the smiles you pass on!!!

DesertHen said...

What a busy week of learning you had. =)

The furniture thing and walking around in the dark made me smile. My mother-in-law would do just that very thing when she knew my husband would be out maybe having a beer or two when he was younger. He came home one night, opened his bedroom door and went to flop on his bed....it wasn't there, but had been moved across the room....lol!

Farm Girl said...

Okay, I am now up off the ground from laughing myself out of my chair.
Really you cannot turn a doorknob with a pork chop without spilling you ice tea? I have done some or all of these things so that is why I find it so funny, and do you know, I know that snakes can do that jumping thing. I have never figured out how something with no feet or legs can jump like that, or even climb trees like they do.
I hope you have a wonderful day,
thanks for the laugh.

Irene said...

This list has made me very curious and I would like to further discuss it with you. Too bad you live so far away. We could have some iced tea and a pork chop together while we talked about it. You'd have to come here, though, it's too hot for me over there. If it can melt steering wheels...

StitchinByTheLake said...

I love that one about the furniture. :) My husband used to say if he was away for the evening he wouldn't dare come in without turning on a light for fear of falling over something I'd moved while he was away! blessings, marlene

carolina nana said...

What a great post,love it!!

Blessings to you
MArilyn

Chickadee said...

Woah, a steering wheel can melt? Now THAT'S hot! I melted a credit card recently in my car. On accident of course. Well, not melted so much as warped.

And I'm curious of what happened for you to find out that a snake can jump over 1/3rd their length.

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