Object to be Destroyed by Man Ray |
Tick Tock
Count the knocksTestosterone played
Estrogen lost
Today
Tick Tock
Nine-one-one
Fred wanted to play
Sally fell
They carried her away.
Tick Tock
Sally's home
To Fred, "Wanna play?''
Thinking he would win
He jumped right in.
Tick-Tock
Sally cleaned his clock
"No more," she said
As she bashed his head
They hauled them both away.
21 comments:
Ohhh... I love the playfulness of this with the serious subject! Great contrast! Poor Fred - got what he deserved!
there you go..back to the dark...haha...oh my...i think his eye got stuck on an arm...smiles.....lol...this has a fun rhythm to it that makes it all the more...intriguing...smiles.
hahahahahaha Dark, playful, funny, serious--- You are always taking us back and forth in an intriguing way!
Dark and playful . Look out Steven King you have some real competition here !
Oh, my... metronomes can really bring out some killer ideas.
Well written, though very deep and dark.
I'm always up for a bit of romance... and head-bashing...
A serious subject treated with great effect.
a timely piece that's for sure.
Well done!
a timely piece that's for sure.
Well done!
timely tall tale of tick tocking...
That is a rhythm that needed to end. It is a strange combination. Reads playfully, but a very serious subject. I felt guilty enjoying it
Ohhhhhh... Is this about sex? I could hardly remember how to spell it..or..do I just have a dirty mind. Probably the latter. :)
Lordy, I'm the only one that said the "S" word! Oops!
Samacked that down, yeah.
well done...thanks for sharing
People are always getting their heads bashed in over here. Is it a secret desire you have?
Uh-oh. (giggling at Irene's comment)
I love the way this prompt takes us all different places on a similar theme
I think you've shown us metronomes bring out the worst in everyone! Fun rhyme and meter really highlights your very serious subject matter.
Oh, the playfulness muted the tragedy in this piece. It reminded me of a nursery rhyme which hides some cruel thing behind the lilting words. This is very well done.
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